
Blog Post: People Pleasing – Shape-Shifting to Keep Others Comfortable I've lost count of how many times I've heard someone say, "Well, please yourself," or "Suit yourself." For me, those words still echo in my mind, often in the voice of my mum. They were her way of expressing disapproval when I didn’t take her advice. And while I know she meant well, the message I received was clear: If I went my own way, I was letting her down. I grew up in a military family. My dad was an Army Warrant Officer—a man of few words and guarded emotions. From an early age, I realised that the only way to earn his attention or any affection was to be "a good boy." That meant following the rules, staying agreeable, and suppressing any behaviour that might ruffle feathers. It felt like being a soldier, always marching in line. This strategy stayed with me well into adulthood. I chased his approval, hoping that if I behaved perfectly, I'd finally be loved or at leas...